Obama To Enter Diplomatic Talks With Raging Wildfire

"This is a different President. He just didn't think that a combative approach...would be the best way to solve this crisis..."¹


Obama To Enter Diplomatic Talks With Raging Wildfire

When the Onion gets it right, well, it gets it right...






¹ - (Because he saves the combative approach for fellow Americans, American allies and other capitalist pigs...)

Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

As Homer Simpson would say, "it's funny 'cause it's true..."


Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

Can they really make a full-length movie of this?

From the Onion News Network, a report that Paramount is planning to adapt the Ironman trailer into a full-length film!

Keys to the game...

The Onion has the keys to the game. But apparently, they stole some of them from CBS...

New England - Keep playing better than anyone else in the history of football...

Indianapolis - Remember to win game, or else undefeated season is over...

And more...

I KNEW there was a reason!

Red Sox Attempt To Break Fabled 'Curse Of Relief Pitcher Curtis Leskanic'

Pitted against the Colorado Rockies in the 2007 Fall Classic, the team that for two long years seemed like it might be destined to lose forever has a chance to finally put an end to its 36-month-long World Series drought. However, the Red Sox must first overcome the famed Curse of Curtis Leskanic, which caused medium-to-long-suffering fans much anguish and heartache during the period between 2005 and 2006.

...

"We never should've gotten rid of Leskanic," Everett added. "Just think of how many more rings we'd have now."

...

"Ending the curse against the Rockies will just make it that much sweeter," said Boston resident Terry McMahon. "Not even Curtis Leskanic can stop this team!"

"I just pray that my son can see the Sox win at least one World Series in his lifetime," said Boston resident Sal Fischer of his son Cody, 2.